Mar 5, 2016 (Sara)
Even with Scott’s wonderful words expressing how grateful we are, there truly is no way to do our feelings justice. The fundraising via Go Fund Me, Yogurt Beach, the leukemia bracelets, Nature’s Bakery donations, and anything else people have worked on or are working on…it is all truly amazing and inspiring.
This truly is not about the money. This is about the powerful Love that we feel In the deepest parts of our heart. It is about the sense of security and ability to try to protect our child (and her brother) from the unknown as well as prepare for the inevitable. It is about knowing that we have the resources to purchase the right tools as well as the right care to promote the best possible outcome for our little girl.
This is about community and the restoration of faith in humanity. I have said it before and I will say it again, my people are a great people and I am lucky to have you all. You have proven to not just our family and our own community but to others distanced by land, water, and life.
I have asked myself lately, “what have I done to deserve this”…. I am not talking about the child with cancer – those type of questions are moot. I am reflecting on the amount of support. I know that we are good people. I know that we give support to people when we can and feel it best. I know that a child with cancer can bring out some amazing magic. Even the thought that Maya is so awesome and darling and cute…and fun and smart and caring…and funny…it just doesn’t add up. This feels like too much. It all feels like too much. I truly hope we will be able to thank each and everyone of you. I just don’t have any idea how to do that.
This support, your support, is the fire filing Maya’s breath and fight. It is the water protecting her castle while filling a deep moat.
Maya is still building her strength. Her blood counts and energy might be low but her spirit is not weak. She is physically changing but only for a time. This is a battle of stamina and when I feel like mine is running dry, I look to her and gain it back. Maya is running on fire and water and both elements exude through her eyes…her soul. Her spirit and light are lit from the love from all of us and is bright enough to be seen from lands away. No fear little Dragon. You have an army built of warriors of Love. And they fight for you. We fight for you. And we fight together. We are stronger than I can even imagine.
Motherly assessment: Her labs came back yesterday – Hgb: 9.7, WBC: 0.6, Platelets: 149 (yay for donors!!!), ANC….12. To be honest, I’m not sure there is much difference between 12 and the 50 she has been cruzing at but, she is pretty much in a bubble. A bubble of love as well as disinfection. She has the ravenous appetite like the dragon she is. Belly is still distended and her petechia is slightly worse. We called the on call oncologist today…sounds like she is still with in normal expectations for induction. This is nasty stuff but we are hoping that in 10 days we’ll hear the wonderful word …remission. Then the battle will take a new turn.
Love is life. Thank you.